But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapistto help us out with the details.
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No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off limits, and all questions remain anonymous. Do you have any ideas for roleplaying or trying specific scenarios? A: This was such a fun question that it required more than one article to sufficiently answer!
As a reminder, domination and submission are pretty wideand mean different things to different people. Some of the games on this list might sound really hot; some may feel like they cross the line.
Talk through each of these suggestions together and see which ones seem safe and sexy to the two of you. This is a ridiculously hot game that can be adjusted for all different levels of kink. The Dom blindfolds the sub, or makes them promise to keep their eyes closed.
Here are some possibilities:.
2. ice ice baby
A correct guess might elicit a reward, while an incorrect one might earn a "punishment," like spanking. Another variation of the above is to have the sub guess what the Dom is going to do to them next. Or you could move on to actual activities. Possibilities might include:. The sub will feel even more at the mercy of their Dom. Plus, when one sense is cut off, the others get heightened.
Try blindfolding the sub. You can limit it to a play session, or a specific day, or you can try longer periods of time.
The Dom can choose sexy lingerie, accessories, or role-playing outfits, or demand that the sub be naked all day. Have the Dom pick something that the sub has to wear out and about. Some hot possibilities are a collar or harness that can be hidden under clothing.
Or try a sex toy, like a pair of Ben-Wa balls. This game can make simple trips to the grocery store or the ATM ridiculously hot. If you both want to indulge a bit of your exhibitionistic leanings, the Dom can request that the sub wear a more public accessory that hints at the relationship between the two of you.
Evil dom games: layering stimulation to overwhelm a sub
Up the heat factor by having the Dom place the item on the sub before going out. There are a million different ways to play this game, but the basic idea is that the Dom surprises their sub with a specific set of personal requirements that have to be fulfilled by the time the Dom gets home.
The Dom can leave a list in a place where the sub will find it, or can send text or an. It can even be set up like a treasure hunt, with specific clues and accoutrements set up along the way.
Check out the Dua from JeJoue. The Dom can instruct the sub to insert the toy and wait until the Dom decides to turn it on.
1. dom worship
The Dom can tease their sub by only giving them little tastes of vibratory pleasure. The sub can also be given specific instructions not to orgasm, even as the Dom goes to town with the controls. The sub gets rewards for following instructions properly, and punishments for not doing a good enough job.
One fun way to play around with these dynamics is to make two sets of cards. In one set, write down a of punishments.
5 bdsm games to spice up your sex life tonight
Make sure you talk about boundaries when making this set. On the other, write down the rewards.
Whenever the sub does something good they get to pick a card from the reward deck. When they do something bad, they choose from the punishment deck. In this game, the sub acts as if they were nothing more than a sex doll. The sub tries their best to remain still and not make a noise. The Dom can position the sub as they like and do what they please. In order to play this game safely, make sure you agree on a safeword or safe symbol beforehand.
2. submission training
You should also discuss boundaries of what activities are on the table and which ones are off, so you can both fully get into character. By Vanessa Marin. The Guessing Game.